The 31 Planes of Existence

Girls
First there was Mary she looked like Mariah Carey
I thought she loved me but it was to the contrary
When we went out I paid for everything
She made me buy her a car and a diamond ring
She was a gold digger and she begged me to stay
I was stuck in her trap and couldn’t get away
Finally I saw through her
I grabbed all my stuff and said “screw her”

You know girls they come and they go
But the perfect girl you may never know
You know girls they come and they go
But the perfect girl you may never know

Next there was Jenny, she didn’t want a penny
When it came to money she didn’t need any
She liked me even though our tastes were varied
But after the third date she wanted to get married
I said “Lady you must be crazy”
Or maybe your mind is a little hazy
She tried to make me see it her way
But before she could convince me I told her I was gay

You know girls they come and they go
But the perfect girl you may never know
You know girls they come and they go
But the perfect girl you may never know

Then there was Sam, she didn’t give a damn
Everything she said and did was a sham
She said I was here one and only
But that turned out to be bologna
I loved her so much until I found out all these lies
It turned out she was with four other guys
Not only that she had a spouse
That’s when I struck a match and burnt down her house

You know girls they come and they go
But the perfect girl you may never know
You know girls they come and they go
But the perfect girl you may never know

Finally I met Christina we ran into each other at the arena
You wouldn’t be able to look away if you seen her
She didn’t have no kids and she didn’t have a man
She had blonde hair and the perfect tan
It was amazing how great we got along
I knew there had to be something wrong
She was too good to be true
It turns out she had AIDS and now I do, too